Okay, I admit it: I didn't post first thing this morning because I have been wrestling with an elephant. I hate to even write this down, but I have to admit defeat for now in the weight loss department....because it's getting frustrating to write about and boring to read!
I have referred vaguely to a health problem in past posts and it is becoming clear to me that I need to get my body's equilibrium back in order to succeed at getting my weight under control; trying to do both at the same time is driving me crazy. I keep thinking that if I can only get this diet or that plan down to a habit then I can deal with other things that need fixing, but then I get so angry with myself over not being able to do such a little thing that it bleeds into other parts of my life...when really, I think I have been approaching this self-improvement game backwards. Don't get me wrong, weight loss is still on the priority list, it's just been bumped down a notch until I get my head (and my, um, hormonal/chemical imbalances) back into the right place.
So where to from here? Do I keep blogging? I don't know. I don't want to put more depressing shit out there; this blog was intended to be a lighthearted look at all the stupid things we do to ourselves in the name of the number on the scale and I've gone kinda dark on everyone (sorry.) I fully intend to keep inching toward completing my 5 day workout split inside a week (and I got a little closer this week!), I have the 1/2 ironman this summer and I just signed up to do the Ride to Conquer Cancer again. The goals have remained the same...so maybe what I'll do is keep posting once a week and leave the numbers out until I am ready to focus on weight loss again. Hopefully that will be sooner than later!
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